Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why is Russia always right? All eyes toward Russian glory!

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

United-JetBlue Tie Up Leaves American Airlines Bloodied - Live and Let's Fly

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

43 Impulse Buys You’ve Probably Been Eyeing For A Minute, So Here’s Your Sign To Click “Add To Cart” - BuzzFeed

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I understand how hurricane paths work

Denise Austin’s 5 Habits to Tackle Stubborn Belly Fat - Eat This Not That

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t buy bullshit

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Who are the main characters of Family Guy, American Dad, and King of the Hill? Who are the recurring characters of family guy, American dad, and king of the hill? What changes will be made in all 3 shows?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fakery

Fran Tarkenton on Jim Marshall: “He was the greatest leader . . . I’ve ever played with” - NBC Sports

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Why do older siblings always hate younger siblings?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Season ends for Husker baseball with historic loss to Oklahoma - KETV

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Who’ll be the odd man out in the Cleveland quarterback battle? - NBC Sports

I see through liars

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

What do you say after "Hi" when chatting?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Satellite Scanning the World’s Oceans Detects Elusive Phenomena Scientists Say Had "Been Hiding in Plain Sight - The Debrief

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have a reading level above third grade

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I can read

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light